The NAFD’s Five-Step Funeral Wishes Guide

  1. Talking about your funeral doesn’t make death happen. Grab your favourite drink, invite someone close to you round (or switch your smartphone to record) and make yourself comfortable.
  2. Do the personal stuff first:
    • What kind of service would you like and where would you like it to be held? In a church? In a crematorium? In a woodland? Somewhere particularly special to you?
    • What song best sums you up? As you are borne out of the funeral service what tune will those close to you be listening to?
    • Who would you like to give your eulogy? Can’t choose from amongst your friends or don’t want your partner to have to do it? Write one yourself. A growing number of people are choosing to do just that.
    • What would you like everyone to wear? Black, bright colors or even fancy dress?
    • Personal touches make it special. This could be from writing something yourself to be read out to having a theme. NAFD members have done Wild West, Star Wars, classic car, railway, pink and many other themed funerals. Would you have a theme?
    • How about a memorial – from a plaque on a local park bench to having a tree planted.  Would you like a headstone? If you want to be cremated would you like your ashes to be scattered somewhere meaningful, inked into a tattoo, turned into a diamond, preserved as a DNA helix or fired into the air in a huge firework display? It’s all possible.
  3. Give your loved ones some basic principles to work with such as whether you’d prefer burial or cremation, would you want donations to a particular charity…and is there anywhere particular you’d like your final resting place to be? It can also be as important to say what you don’t want as what you do want.
  4. Decide if you are able to set aside funds now or if you can start financially planning for this. If you have no savings to set aside or even no idea what you would like to do, say that too. Even just talking about your uncertainty breaks down a barrier.
  5. Let those close to you know what you’ve decided, put it somewhere safe and let your family or friends where to find the information should they need it, or give a copy to your chosen funeral director …and then get on with living!